I absolutely love this song! It’s everything a mom says in a day condensed into 2 1/2 minutes and set to music (William Tell Overture).

One phrase I find myself saying a lot lately is, “Because I said so.” I never thought I would resort to this conversation stopper. I always figured I’d explain lovingly and patiently why kids shouldn’t eat candy for breakfast or leap from their beds to grab the ceiling fan cord. And then my kids would listen, comprehend, and accept. Maybe they might even say, “Okay, mommy,” in a chirpy voice. Strangely, the reality of my life is much different. Witness this recent conversation between me and my son: (more…)

I spent a couple hours last night staring at my belly. At first in utter amazement that it is so full and round – I think it’s much bigger now than it was at this point with my first – and I’m wondering how much bigger it could possibly get.

Then I sat back and enjoyed the show. My belly alternated between waves and quick jabs way down low and way up high near my ribs seemingly at the same time, which got me thinking. How can he do that? Is he super long? Or maybe he has a secret twin living in there with him? I’ve had two ultrasounds during the course of this pregnancy and neither detected two babies. Nevertheless, all of this activity seems a bit curious. I don’t remember my first making such efficient use of the space available to him.

So I spend my nights wondering exactly what he’s doing in there. Is he hatching his escape plan? Is he rockin’ out to the rhythm of my heartbeat? Or maybe he’s in training for a future Olympics. I guess I’m not meant to know. But his nighttime performances are more entertaining than pretty much anything else.

Unless you’ve had your head in the sand for the past few weeks, you’ve probably heard about the hullabaloo over Motrin’s latest ad. Motrin tried to tap into the mom community by showing an ad about a mom who wears her baby in a sling but has back pain and needs Motrin for pain relief. Here’s the ad:

And here’s a transcript: (more…)

The number three has started to take on a certain magic around here. My son will be three years old a week from Saturday. And lately, everything is more exciting to him – and, subsequently, to me too.

Halloween was a kick-ass holiday. He totally “got it” this year and literally ran from house to house with the neighborhood kids like they were a little gang. The idea of his birthday and a party has intrigued him since the summer, as we counted down how many more friends and family would have a birthday before his would come. He’s out of his head with excitement about (more…)

Every few months I resolve to be greener in my approach to household cleaning products. I go out and buy some new non-toxic cleaner that won’t leach chemicals into my house. Most recently I purchased a concentrated cleaner from Shaklee. Just mix it with water and it will clean anything in your home, my Shaklee rep promised. Well, I tried it on everything in my home and, guess what, it didn’t clean a darn thing. Not the grimy windows, not the greasy stove, and certainly not the ring of soap scum in my tub. Anywhere serious cleansing power was needed, Shaklee was not up to the job. So what do I do? Well, I pull out my Windex, my 409, and my Tilex Soap Scum Remover and I get this house clean! But I’m not happy about it; I worry about the chemicals I’m breathing in when I spray out this stuff. I worry about the toxins settling into the ground water or being washed out to sea. And I worry about the accumulation of toxins in my son’s (more…)

The events of last week made me question my decision to become a parent. My son was VERY DIFFICULT last week. Perhaps it was because he was just getting over an ear infection; perhaps it was because he is freaked out that we’ve put our house up for sale; or perhaps he just occasionally needs to be a Royal-Pain-in-the-Ass. Whatever the reason, he would not cooperate in any way with any request. Now, I try to be polite and positive with my son. I try to respect his preferences for a certain cup, a particular shirt, or a specific routine. But there are times when he just needs to SHUT UP and do what I tell him. Last Wednesday morning was one of (more…)

It’s been rainy and warm here lately, not my favorite combination of weather conditions. I like a rainy day and I like a warm day but not together. I prefer rainy and cool or sunny and warm. But I can’t control the weather any more than I can control my lust for chocolate so I just keep eating it and eating it—I mean, putting up with it. But all these clouds have got me feeling kind of blue. Or perhaps it’s the piss-poor economy, or the mood-changing Clomid I’m taking to try to get pregnant, or the overwhelming task of packing up boxes to prepare for our move to a new house. Whatever the reason, this November rain has got me down.

I’m fighting back with (more…)

A barista at my local Starbucks is interested in my caffeine intake. A recent conversation with said barista went something like this.

Me: I’d like a tall Chai Tea Latte, please.

Barista: Sure. Uh, do you know that the Chai has caffeine in it?

Me: Yes.

Barista: Well…you’re pregnant, right?

Me: Uh, yeeeees.

Barista: (Hesitantly) I just needed to let you know that.

Me: O-kaaaay.

A bit surprised and not able to (more…)

I’m reading an incredibly well-researched book called “The World Without Us” by Alan Weisman. It’s also an alarming book in that it uncovers ways in which humans have changed our environment, usually for the worse. One part that particularly stuck with me was about a seemingly innocuous product, a small plastic resin micropellet known as a nurdle. Nurdles are typically under 5mm in diameter and are formed as a raw material or are ground down from larger plastic elements.

Something that small can’t possibly be harmful to the environment, can it? According to British marine biologist Richard Thompson, (as reported in Weisman’s book) it can. He studied 40 years of (more…)

I walk.

I walk in the cool morning air, I walk in the late afternoon sun, I walk in the evening’s chill. I walk fast, I walk slow, I stop to take pictures. I walk up hill, I walk downhill, I walk around the track at a nearby state park.

I walk.

I walk in the woods, I walk around my neighborhood, I walk on the treadmill at the YMCA. I walk in the woods for a spiritual experience, just myself on a leaf-strewn path among towering trees. I walk around my neighborhood when I’m pressed for time. There’s nothing spiritual about this walk; I spend most of the walk cataloging my neighbors’ landscaping mistakes. On bitterly cold or very rainy days I walk on the treadmill at the Y. I spend this time critiquing other people’s bodies, my own fat butt flopping up and down behind me.

I walk.

I walk, I walk, I walk. I walk a mile-and-a-half loop around my development, I walk for two hours on wooded trails, I walk for 30 minutes on the treadmill. I don’t lose weight. I go home and reward myself with a brownie (or three).

I walk.

I walk to clear the cobwebs from my brain. I walk to energize my creativity. I walk for fitness and for strength. I walk for myself.

I walk.